UPDATE 1/27: Creating Hope After Sexual Assault
Congratulations Cheyenne on being one of several Minnesota Book Award nominees just announced today!
When I talk with other survivors of sexual assault, I often remind them that healing mirrors the stages of grief because recovering from trauma is, in many ways, a grieving process. We grieve the loss of innocence, who we were before the trauma, the future we envisioned, and sometimes even friends and family who do not offer the support we need.
After my assault by someone I knew, I desperately searched for resources to help me navigate the confusion, anxiety, and countless questions I had. The lack of information left me in the dark, kept me stuck in denial, and delayed my healing.
Two years passed before I discovered a document for attorneys about common “rape myths.” It helped me begin to understand that what I’d experienced was, in fact, rape.
Initially, I felt angry. Why isn’t this information available to everyone who needs it? But I also felt validated. This finally empowered me to acknowledge my trauma, make informed decisions about therapy, and report the crime.
My case went to trial but resulted in a not-guilty verdict. I realized things could have gone differently if I’d had the information to make informed decisions earlier. If I had understood that it was rape, even though I knew my rapist, maybe I would’ve sought out therapy or reported sooner. If I’d had guidance on how to tell my loved ones, maybe I would have disclosed right away.
As I sat grieving after the trial, I knew I needed to create a resource that could empower others with information they needed to make decisions that could change the trajectory of their lives and their healing.
I was inspired to create “We Are the Evidence: A Handbook for Finding Your Way After Sexual Assault.” It is a comprehensive book that provides accessible and practical guidance for survivors and their loved ones: defining sexual assault, breaking down myths, navigating therapy, reporting to the legal system, going through a court process, creating an individualized healing plan.
The 300-page book brings together voices of survivors, therapists, professors, nurses, detectives, lawyers, and dieticians. I moved through the stages of grief while I was writing the book, and even started to feel hopeful about the future.
The thought that I could make a small difference for someone kept me going on days when I wasn’t sure I could.
I have placed some of the books in Little Free Library locations. When I check back and see that someone has taken a copy, I know I’m helping someone in my community find a way forward. Book reviews and messages from survivors let me know how the book helped them to disclose, seek therapy, or report to the legal system. We have so much work to do for the sexual assault public health crisis. Information is power.
In 2025, my hope is that Minnesota will shift how it addresses sexual violence. I want to see restorative justice become available for survivors. I want to see health care providers become better trained to identify and support survivors. Above all, I want survivors to have the resources they need to make informed choices.
Ask your local library to add the book to their collections, and buy the book for a Little Free Library box in your own community. Buy from a local independent bookseller, or at Bookshop.org
If you appreciate our ongoing coverage about gender-based violence:
For 2025 coverage, Minnesota Women’s Press earned a community leadership award, three photography awards, and four editorial awards, including for coverage of social issues and for our Spring 2025 “Know Your Rights” special section supported by Unidos MN. Our publisher was named Journalist of the Year by Violence Free Minnesota for gender-based violence coverage.
