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Commentary from Someone Who Knew the Shooter as a Child and Speaks About the Country’s Giant Unfulfilled Need

by Reposted by permission from Sarah Reely, who shared this in social media
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I’m nervous to post this publicly but I feel like it needs to be said.

Robin Westman was one of my former students. This morning I saw an older photograph with glasses and natural hair color, along with her deadname, and immediately recognized her: THAT’S BOB.

Robin was in my class when I still taught at a previous school that I will not name, because I do not wish to place blame or involve anyone else. I am only speaking about my truth and experiences.
Back when Robin still went by the nickname Bob, I knew this was a kid who needed help. She was definitely odd, was really into furries and odd artwork and said some odd things, but wasn’t violent towards others to my knowledge. Being odd isn’t a red flag — I was an odd kid myself and have always had a heart for the odd kids. She did not fit in well, as one might imagine would happen to a queer kid in a conservative environment, so I intentionally made a point to build a relationship with this student. She loved art and created this weird little sculpture as a gift that I lost in one of my moves but I kept a picture of it just like I keep pictures of all the quirky little artworks my students make.
I reported a need for help because I saw the evidence of self-harm on her arms. Self harm is either a cry for help, an indication of self hate, or both. But it’s always sign something is wrong. Then she transferred her again and she vanished. One of the hardest parts about being a teacher is knowing that once students leave our doors, we’ll never see or hear from many of them ever again. Every teacher has a list in their hearts of former students they always think about and hope they are okay. “Bob” (Robin) was on my list.

I am NOT posting this to build sympathy for a murderer or place blame on any one person or entity for failing to stop this.

I am posting this to remind people that it’s a snowball effect of multiple system failures at a national level, that every murderer was once a kid in someone’s classroom who needed help, and that this issue is so much deeper and more complicated than we want to admit.

The left is crying “IT’S THE GUNS” and while I agree we need more regulation around firearms, Robin didn’t have a criminal record. Even with stricter gun laws, this person had no formal documentation that would prevent anyone from purchasing a gun. We currently live in a country oversaturated with guns, with firearms ingrained deeply into our culture. We can work to create buy-in for gun law reforms, but until then we need to operate within the country we actually live in and not the country we wish we lived in.

Then the right is crying “IT’S THE TRANS COMMUNITY,” which is not only factually incorrect — because almost all mass shooters have been cisgender men — but the scapegoating is so so dangerous to a community of people who just want to exist and be who they are in peace. I am scared for my transgender friends and community members that this tragedy is already being weaponized against them.
Weak firearm regulations ARE a part of it but they’re only a part of the equation, and changing this would only be like slapping a bandaid on a bullet wound. We also need to do something about the lack of mental health support for troubled youth (the year long waitlists, the difficulty connecting with the correct resources, the stigma, schools being able to afford only ONE mental health specialist at schools with hundreds of kids to try and keep track of — if they have [a mental health specialist] at all — and the COST especially without insurance to just get an evaluation are all barriers).
But we can’t even have a conversation about any of this because our country is so goddamned POLARIZED. We can’t get anything done because all we do is fight about it. And who benefits from keeping middle and lower class Americans at each other’s throats? It’s the 2% and the people in power: why actually work together to invest in prevention and support when division can be exploited for election fodder? Why would politicians want to invest in real progress when they can funnel that money into the agendas of their billionaire campaign backers?

This is a big messy problem that I worry will NEVER be solved as long as our nation is so divided and everyone is so unwilling to bend, even as at-risk youth fall through the cracks and our children are being gunned down in their schools.

 

The Children Who Were Killed

For comments from the two families whose children were killed in the shooting, read this Minnesota Reformer story.
Stories of Boundary-Breaking WomenPart 1: Next Steps in Gun Violence Protection