The story of why I am a wedding officiant is deeply rooted in the relationships I have with my sister and the women who are part of my chosen family. Officiating a wedding is just telling a story. It's creating a narrative of a relationship and having family and friends share in the couple's intention and their commitment to one another.

The weddings I've officiated have brought me so much joy - most importantly by being able to share in special days with human beings that I love and admire, but also in the creation, craft and narrative of a wedding ceremony.

The first wedding I officiated was for two friends, partially because I had a hand in introducing them to one another and saw them through each stage of their relationship. Describing closeness, as well as special and specific ways a couple supports each other, is the kernel of a wedding ceremony for me. Since I had witnessed these moves of love that are individual to this relationship, communicating that during the ceremony was easy.

For my sister's wedding, I was simply able to pour my heart out about how much I admired her and her husband and I let my joy become everyone else's. I found a lot of happiness in being able to show our family and friends the relationship that I had seen begin, change, evolve and bloom. That didn't stop me from crying my way through the ceremony.

My sister's best friend asked me to officiate her wedding last summer. She is an only child and is like another sister to me. She met her future spouse in high school. I got to watch them meet, fall in love and dedicate themselves to each other over the course of a decade. I was able to include that experience and perspective in their ceremony - as well as weave together a pastiche of passages from books they both enjoyed. It made the service unique to them and meaningful.


I am constantly honored and humbled to share in the sweetness of a wedding of people I hold nearest and dearest. My experiences have been honest outpourings of support, love and devotion for couples that already had homes in my heart.

Quinn Dreasler is an artist and craftsperson. She lives in St. Paul and skates for the Minnesota RollerGirls. quinndreasler.com

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